Blocks
to Prosperity
"The
course does not aim at teaching the meaning of love, for that
is beyond what can be taught. It does aim, however, at removing
the blocks to the awareness of love's presence, which is your
natural inheritance."
- A Course In Miracles
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There is a lot of financial advice about how to be prosperous and become
a millionaire, including
- You need to own real estate
- You need to payoff your mortgage
- You need to have your own business
- You need to check your FICO score
- You need to save a few dollars a day
However, life sometimes is not about what you need to do, rather what
you need to undo. If you are striving
to find prosperity you can end up trying every get rich quick scheme
out there
and have
no luck. Rather, you many just need to find your blocks to
prosperity in order to allow it into your life, because prosperity (as
with love) is "your natural inheritance".
Why would your creator want anything less for his children?
It may sound kind of silly on why someone would block prosperity.
However, this is usually an unconscious decision. The
decision may have been planted as early as one's childhood, for example
the belief that money
is evil and will corrupt you (e.g., "money
is root of all evil"). By hearing this, the child may learn
that it is better to avoid money and thus make unconscious decisions
to avoid having money
(e.g., through spending).
The
goal of this section is to make you more aware of your unconscious thoughts
so that you can consciously determine what thoughts are serving
your greater good. Below
is a sample of thoughts (past, present and future) that may be blocking you from prosperity.
Past Thoughts
- Beliefs
Most of what we first learned about money comes from our parents
and relatives. Some of their beliefs may be influencing
us to today without us knowing it. How
many of you have heard one of these beliefs, and just shrugged it
off without thinking of its potential meaning?
Belief |
Potential Meaning |
| Money is route of all evil |
If you have money, you are neither good nor
spiritual |
| Money does not grow on trees |
It is a struggle to have money; it only comes from hard work |
| A penny saved is a penny earned |
You need to hoard your money and watch every nickel and dime
that you spend |
| Easy come, easy go |
Saving money is too hard, so why try |
| We can not afford it |
We are broke |
| It is never enough |
You will never get ahead; you are doomed to poverty |
| The tax man cometh |
We work so hard and the government just takes what ever we
get |
| Money makes world go around |
Those with money are powerful, thus we are weak
because we have no money |
| Money talks and .... |
The most important thing is to have is money |
| Born with silver spoon in his mouth |
He is so lucky to be born into wealth and I wish that I had
just a little of such luck |
Would
you actually say, "I will never get ahead". Some
would not because it is a defeatist attitude. Yet, we perpetuate
many of our family and society's more subtler money beliefs without
admitting to it. It
is important to find the hidden beliefs in your family's money history. Once
you understand what it is, you can consciously change your thoughts
of how you see the world. Instead of carrying around an
unconscious defeatist attitudes, you can change your thoughts and
beliefs to:
- I will do what I love and the money will follow
- I can enjoy my money and save for retirement at the same time
- I can be prosperous no matter what my background or education
achievement is
- There is more than enough money to go around
- Role Models
Role models have two influences on us; they show us what
we can do and what we can not do. Have you noticed how
much attention is made when a child is the first in his/her
family to go to college? If college is not in
the family history, many children do not feel that it is right
for them. So, being the first to go to college is breaking
the mold and is celebrated. Some children are lucky enough
to have role models (e.g., parents or relatives) that will show
them that
anything
is possible. A child
needs role models to recognize that there are limitless possibilities
in this country. If
their parents are not appropriate role models, children may
need to look for someone else from their community who has
achieved similar
dreams to what they want to achieve. The key is to broaden
a child's sense of possibilities rather than limit them based on
what their immediate family have or have not achieved.
However,
some people today believe that America has change from the land
of opportunity to a land where generations are doomed to a life in
poverty, believing they can only achieve what their role models (parents)
have
achieved. This is a a harder model to break when a child
has seen their role models fail. The belief in failure starts
to become ingrained into their psyche. Breaking away from family
history is possible. It
takes a conscious decision on which role model one decides to follows. Unfortunately,
some of today's role models for our teens are
usually not role models such
as doctors, engineers, teachers and architects
who were
studious
in school and
worked hard to get ahead rather they choose role models that do not
follow a good example (e.g., those who rather look good than be good). So,
choose your role models wisely.
Present
- Resistances
Too
many times people are holding themselves back from reaching
their dreams, even though they may not recognize it. Being
comfortable in what is, is easier than moving forward to a future
that is uncertain. Even
if someone wants change, they can find it hard to move forward because
of habitual thinking. Newton's
1st law of physics states objects at rests tend to stay at
rest due to resistance. So
what resistances do you have? Part of it is in your language,
using phrases like:
- "I can't" - many learn this in school
due to getting frustrated in math or
foreign language class. It
becomes
"I can't do math"
or "I can't speak Spanish". In
finances, it is "I can't reduce spending or I can't
save or I am not good with
money". However,
if you really needed to, how many of these things are you really
incapable of accomplishing when looking back at the situation? Usually,
very little. There
are ways to cut spending or save, just as there are
ways to learn math or Spanish. Yet, when we say "I
can't",
it is giving up control of the situation and becoming powerless
to change your circumstances. So watch your words and say
things like "I
choose to ...." instead.
- "Yes, but ..." - with all the
financial advice out there, one would think that it would be
easy to
save for retirement, however many still are not saved what
they should have. One
of the many reasons
is because many believe that their situation is unique. One
of the favorite sayings that I hear when giving suggestions
is
"Yes,
but ...". This
is where the advise may sound good, yet the listener is thinking
of reasons why the advice will not work in his/her situation. "Yes,
but" is
resisting change instead of working towards change. The
reasons that people give when they say "Yes, but" may be legit
or may be just be an excuse. Yet,
if you do not challenge your beliefs, the changes that you
desire will not occur. Again, watch your words
and use things like "In my situation, how would that
be applied ....."
- Victim
Playing the victim is about playing small. Playing small
means that you do not believe that you can change your life. As
with any beliefs, what ever you believe is what will show up. If you
believe that change will not happen because you are incapable
of change, then your inaction will continue
you down
the path you are on.
A few months ago, Oprah did a show on the working poor. In her
message board, there are a lot of stories on how it is to be poor.
Yet, there are few stories about what people are doing to better
their lives. They are waiting for an increase in minimum wage
and universal health care. To want to change the minimum wage
or have universal health care is good goal to strive to. Yet,
changes like these are years in the future (possibly several years).
The question is what can be done now to change how they live on what
they have like sharing resources (e.g., sharing a list of charities
that provide food, clothing and shelter). Yet, these types of messages
were far and few between. Because people sometimes rather relish on
how bad they have it (playing the victim) rather than making changes.
Unfortunately today, there is not a Robin Hood to save the poor. We
need to take the first step in making a change in our own lives.
- Do you believe in you?
Do you believe that prosperity is "your natural
inheritance"? Is there some hesitation or a small part
of you that does not believe this? If
you are struggling with debt, part-time jobs or mounting medical
expenses,
you may believe
that this struggle is a part of your life. If you believe this,
then you will continue to struggle and nothing will change. A
rule of the universe is what we think about will expand. So,
if you are saying that "I
can not get a better job",
then a better job will not show up for you. If
you do not believe that you have the skills valuable enough
that will make you a valuable employee to a company,
why would they
hire you?
Think about it in terms of what your gift to the world is, whether
it is a skill, knowledge
or energy. If you believe that you have something to give
to the world, then you open yourself up to receiving prosperity.
And, the key is everyone has something to give to this world, we
just need to find it in ourselves. However,
if you believe your are doomed to dead-end jobs, then
you remain closed (resistant) to prosperity.
- Hoarding
/Wild Spending
I have been hearing more and more stories about how people
who are trying to avoid debt are cutting up their credit cards, avoiding
shopping or are making a game out of how little they
can
spend to pay off their mortgage to become debt free. This
is in response to years and years where Americans have freely spent
and thus
got themselves
into
serious
credit
card
debt. Thus, the backlash to this wild spending spree is to live
meagerly and pay off all debt (including mortgages) as quickly as
possible. The two ends of the spectrum (not spending and spending
wildly) are setting our
country up for
even greater money woes. We all know how spending wildly can
create burdensome debt. And, getting rid of credit card debt
as quickly as possible is admirable and a desirable goal. However,
if we all stop spending including those who are not in debt (or those
with
manageable
mortgage
debt), we will create a depression that could (will) rival the Great
Depression.
Prosperity is about living in balance, not swinging from one side
of the pendulum (spending widely) to the other (hoarding). This
is because extreme spending and extreme saving is based on
our belief that there is a limited resources; so we either need to
hoard (keep our share of a limited pie) or
spend to
get what we can get what (that it will not be there if we wait). Prosperity is about being open
to what the universe provides both receiving and giving in balance.
Unless
we are in proper balance with giving and receiving then prosperity
will continue to be elusive.
Future
- Fear & Worry
Fear and worry are wasted energy, arising out
of uncertainty of the future. No one knows what
their future will hold. Sometimes we have control of the
future and sometimes we do not.
And, as Wayne Dyer says, if you can control it, why worry because
you are in control. If you can not control it, why worry
because you can not control it. So why worry?
We can
move forward through the fear with our future or hold ourselves
back. At times, fear may appear
to stop us from walking down a dimly lit street in the middle
of the night which is good
because
we sense an potential negative outcome and
take
a different direction to avoid it. So, you decide to take
action and take a different path. Yet, did you avoid the
street out of fear or instinct? I
say instinct because worry and fear are the emotions that continue.
For example, it does not take you 10 minutes trying to decide
whether or not to
walk down the street. Not deciding what to do is fear. Instinct
is the initial warning and your gut telling you to take a different
path. So
trust your instinct and move forward either on the current path
or a new path. Don't
let worry and fear hold you back paralyzed trying to make a decision
because
waiting 10 minutes or 10 years by the street with worry
and fear is just hold you back from your dreams.
In finances,
worrying about retirement distracts us from what we can do now
to save
for it. Because
when you are worrying and fearing the future, you are doing nothing
to change
it. Worry and fear can be destructive. If
you decide to travel down the dark street, a potential perpetrator
is looking
for
people
with fear. A person
walking with his/her head down out of fear has a higher probability
of being victimized compared to a person walking with his/her head
held high. Same with finances, those worrying about
the future are more likely to fall victim to con men and high priced
stock brokers. So, trust your instincts, plan for what you
can, and
move through your fear and worry. There will always
be some fear or worry. However, do not let it hold you back
from reaching your dreams.
Now, you may be asking should I quit my job tomorrow to become
self-employed or to become an actor, if that is my dream?
Maybe or maybe not. For me, it took 2 years of planning and
waiting before I made the final decision to quit my old job.
During that time, I was getting prepared by creating an emergency
fund to support my transition. I also wanted to give my
job another chance to see if I could be as passionate about it as
I wanted. For me, I find working with people rewarding.
So, I looked for opportunities to be mentor at my prior job and then
assisted and taught at personal growth workshops on the weekends. As
I became more dissatisfied with my prior career and being drawn
more to personal growth courses, I
felt more assured of my choice to change careers. For me it
was the right choice. Others may find a new found passion just
by recommitting to their current career with a little bit of spice
(a piece of the dream) thrown into their weekend. It is a
personal choice.
The morale is that you do not need to decide to quit your job
tomorrow to follow your dreams. Many find it rewarding to work
their 9 to 5 job to support their family (one piece of their dream)
and then work or volunteer at night pursuing their other dreams
(e.g., for potential actors, this is can be community theater in the
evenings). Yet, don't just dream about your future and stay
stuck out of fear. Take action by planning how you can
accomplish your dream which may happen by recommitting to your
current job instead of constantly thinking about "what if"
or jumping off the cliff without a parachute (e.g., emergency fund).
- Wanting
There is a difference between a desire and a wanting. A
desire is a target that you are shooting for. A wanting
is trying to fill void (a part of you that does not feel complete). In
having a wanting, you are confirming to the universe that you are
lacking and are incomplete. The
universe will pick up on this sense of lack and expand what you are
thinking about. The
universe does not fulfill your wants (a place of perceived lack). It
does however fulfill your dreams and desires. This is
because the universe does not recognize desperation (wants), it rewards
intent
(goals and dreams). If there is a little piece of you needing
something to make you happy, then you are coming
from lack
and prosperity will continue to allude you. However,
having a desire and not being attached to the outcome (because you
are already
complete) will be rewarded. Therefore having a goal/desire
to be prosperous or find your life partner are great goals however
do not want
either or your goal will slip through your fingers. Think about
it this way, would you respond better to someone who is desperate
and
pleading
or someone
who
is determined and confident?
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